His Ex
I'm going to see my ex! This simple phrase can result in verbal or psychological war without any mercy.
When your boyfriend tells you he is going to see his ex of 1 year, usually, you do not ask yourself too many questions. But if you're jealous or you're twisted, you're going to ask yourself at least 100 questions. Is she going to try to kiss him? She will surely fall into his arms ... Is he still in love with her? Why does he need to see that bitch? Do I punch that bitch tonight or tomorrow morning? Basically, it escalates quickly.
One day, my boyfriend told me: "I have to see my ex and I'll probably have coffee with her." This sentence, which was obviously a statement and not a question, had a relatively flat effect on me. I just ask him why and how and when he intended to see her, he seemed a fairly surprised about my reaction and said "she has to return my bike and I have to give her a bag, it will surely be this Sunday ". At the time, I had no fear or worry, I responded and said "OK".
Later, I talk to my friends; I tell them that my boyfriend is going to have coffee with his ex, because they have stuff from each other. Their reactions were not long in coming, I had an explosion of "but you lost your mind Kachou? "" How can you let him see her Kachou? "" This whore will try to fuck him! "" You should go spy on, on them; I would not trust this bitch”. After the flood of complaints, I looked a little closer on the issue, what if the reason was bogus? What if she wanted to get him back? What if he falls in love with her – again? What if he leaves me? I know with "if" we could rebuild the world ... But it is MY world we're talking about! It's MY boyfriend! So I can get you with an abundance of "if"!
After the bombardment of questions to myself, I wondered why we, women, hate and are jealous of our boyfriends’ exes?
When we are twentysomething, and we date a guy, we know that he has known love, sex and other women, except if the guy is a big geek addicted to magic cards and who spends 18 hours a day playing WOW - a big virgin. Even if we know that our boyfriend, like us, has exes, we have a tendency to violently hate them. Moreover, we do not call them "exes" but, the whores, sluts, hustler, bitches, a lot of sweet little names that make us feel better, because, yes we are better than them. There's nothing to say!
Their exes or ours are similar, we loved them, we slept with them and dumped them or they dumped us - MOUAAAAAA ... Why so much hate? I wanted to know more about her, in order to identify the person. With the support of my friends, I open the folder "But who are you, my boyfriend’s ex?"- This is a new investigation for inspector Kachou!
First thing to do, in order to know better the ex, is first to group the following: the length of the relationship - a year and a half, the date of separation - a year ago, the last time he saw her - 7 months ago, and the primordial element her name - Marianne. Now that I have the necessary information, I am going on Facebook - because yes, a good investigation begins with Facebook. With my friends to my side, I'm on the profile of my boyfriend to see if he is still “friends” with her - the slut - and no surprise, he is still friends with her "pff look her profile picture!” Says one of my friends, “if they are not together why they are still friends on Facebook?”, throws another one - because yes, Facebook is real life, if you have 600 friends on Facebook that means that you are invited to at least 72 events every weekends ... After a few valves on her profile picture and two three criticizes on the fact that my boyfriend is still "friend" with her, I began my espionage by clicking on her photos - because yes, I don’t care about what is on her wall, her pictures are what interests me. But big disappointment, she has only two photos where we don’t see her very well ... As Facebook is not the only social network, I'm continuing to stake- the bitch - on Instagram. I am using the same process, first my boyfriend profile and, again unsurprisingly he is "following" her ... And then, like a flash out of my smart phone, I discovered with amazement that - the bitch – has an awesome body, has a great ass and she has sexy photos on her Instagram. At that time, I’m visualizing in my head my Instagram photos, and most of my pictures are cacti or stuff from the 90s - sigh ... Her Instagram profile is covered of Selfies - even Kanye West is not as fan of himself than she herself. Scrolling down a little in her photos, and then THE shock! Tears on my cheek, dropping beer on the floor, eyes wide open, drooping jaw ... THE photo, the very thing that will haunt me for ever (well at least 3 years) ... A picture of my boyfriend and the bitch!!! I let a long, long "no" at least 50 "o" coming out from my month. Why this bitch touches my boyfriend? Who does she think she is? An irrational hysteria invaded my body, I cannot control myself, I want to break everything, but mostly beat her up. I see you coming, you'll say "but at the same time, it was when they were together," "you also have pictures on Instagram with your ex," "it's over between them now he is with you ", blablabla…. But no, it does not work like that, I see it in her bitch’s eyes, she wants him back!
A wind of irrationality carried me away, I was rambling and was meaningless ... When I saw on my screen that bitch was physically a nuclear bomb where I am a Poly Pocket size 0, it hurts me. I was possessed by the green-eyed monster that makes fun of the victims it devours (editor’s note Iago to Othello in Othello from Shakespeare), Jealousy.
We are not jealous of others because they are detestable, but because they have qualities (physical, moral or material) that make us still lacking. The threat I perceived by seeing the bitch has stirs my jealousy and is largely created by my unconscious. Without even trying to establish social relationships, this bitch was quickly categorized as toxic and harmful. To the point that I have developed some rage, hatred that is based only on a desire to share her stature.
The problem is that this personal feeling, which is nothing but jealousy is often based on appearance, the superficial.
When we are twentysomething, we learn to relativize and then you smile and say "She might be a sick body but in the meantime, I am dating her ex!”.